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funny work quote generated randomly from our collections

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   One hates an author that's all author.
 ~quotes about Writing by George Gordon, Lord Byron, Beppo

   Home is a place not only of strong affections, but of entire unreserve; it is life's undress rehearsal, its backroom, its dressing room.
 ~funny work quote by Harriet Beecher Stowe

   Hope is the feeling we have that the feeling we have is not permanent.
 ~saying on Hope by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
 ~funny work quote by Henry Ford

   It is with our passions as it is with fire and water; they are good servants, but bad masters.
 ~work by Roger L'Estrange, Aesop's Fables, 1692

   Between every two pines is a doorway to a new world.
 ~sayings about work by John Muir

   We're all hookers. What matters is dignity.
 ~quotes about Miscellaneous by Mike Farren

   If you follow reason far enough it always leads to conclusions that are contrary to reason.
 ~funny work quote by Samuel Butler

   Women are nothing but trouble, men are nothing but trouble seekers
 ~saying on Humor by

   Are we not like two volumes of one book?
 ~funny work quote by Marceline Desbordes-Valmore

   True friends stab you in the front
 ~work by Oscar Wilde

   There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of dirty clothes.
 ~sayings about work by Art Buchwald

   A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're at home.
 ~quotes about Smiles by Author Unknown

   The world is full of fools and faint hearts; and yet everyone has courage enough to bear the misfortunes, and wisdom enough to manage the affairs, of his neighbor.
 ~funny work quote by Benjamin Franklin

   A mystique of history and heritage surrounds the New York Yankees. It's like the old days revived. We're loved and hated, but always in larger doses than any other team. We're the only team in any sport whose name and uniform and insignia are synonymous with their entire sport all over the world.... the Yankees mean baseball to more people than all the other teams combined.
 ~saying on Baseball by Paul Blair, quoted in Washington Post, 22 June 1978

   The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
 ~funny work quote by Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891

   The living moment is everything.
 ~work by D.H. Lawrence

   Abstract truth has no value unless it incarnates in human beings who represent it, by proving their readiness to die for it.
 ~sayings about work by Mahatma Gandhi

   Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people.
 ~quotes about Confidence by André Dubus

   It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son to die a bachelor regards celibacy as an actual sin.
 ~funny work quote by H.L. Mencken

   Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language.
 ~saying on Dreams by Gail Godwin

   Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
 ~funny work quote by Gore Vidal

   What we commonly call death does not destroy the body, it only causes a separation of spirit and body
 ~work by Brigham Young

   Every character has an inward spring; let Christ be that spring. Every action has a keynote; let Christ be that note, to which your whole life is attuned.
 ~sayings about work by Henry Drummond

   The best inheritance a person can give to his children is a few minutes of his time each day
 ~quotes about Children by O. A. Battista

   We need - and should encourage and honour - not only discoverers of facts hitherto unknown but explorers of ideas and rethinkers of values.
 ~funny work quote by Walter Moberly, The Crisis in the University

   As long as you think the problem is out there, that very thought is the problem.
 ~saying on Attitude by Stephen Covey

   A blessed companion is a book, - a book that, fitly chosen, is a lifelong friend,... a book that, at a touch, pours its heart into our own.
 ~funny work quote by Douglas Jerrold

   It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you.
 ~work by Dick Cheney

   There are ten church members by inheritance for every one by conviction.
 ~sayings about work by Unknown

   We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.
 ~quotes about Happiness by George Bernard Shaw, Candida, 1898

   The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent
 ~funny work quote by Sam Levenson, You Don't Have to Be in "Who's Who" to Know What's What

   It is our job to make women unhappy with what they have.
 ~saying on Advertising by B. Earl Puckett, quoted in Stephen Donadio, The New York Public Library: Book of Twentieth-Century A

   We do not remember days; we remember moments.
 ~funny work quote by Cesare Pavese, The Burning Brand

   In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
 ~work by Christopher Morley

   The function of education is to help you from childhood not to imitate anybody, but be yourself all the time
 ~sayings about work by Jiddu Krishnamurti

   If the past cannot teach the present and the father cannot teach the son, then history need not have bothered to go on, and the world has wasted a great deal of time.
 ~quotes about Learning by Russell Hoban

   He that is good with a hammer tends to think everything is a nail.
 ~funny work quote by Abraham H. Maslow

   I am what the librarians have made me with a little assistance from a professor of Greek and a few poets.
 ~saying on Learning by Bernard Keble Sandwell

   Prejudices are the chains forged by ignorance to keep men apart.
 ~funny work quote by Countess of Blessington

   Never ruin an apology with an excuse
 ~work by Kimberly Johnson

   Originally marriage meant the sale of a woman by one man to another; now most women sell themselves though they have no intention of delivering the goods listed in the bill of sale.
 ~sayings about work by Robert Graves

   Smoking is pulmonary rape.
 ~quotes about Smoking by Author Unknown

   Sunday school: a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
 ~funny work quote by H.L. Mencken

   If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
 ~saying on Goals by Lawrence J. Peter

   None of us got where we are solely by pulling ourselves up by our bootstrapsWe got here because somebody - a parent, a teacher, an Ivy League crony or a few nuns - bent down and helped us pick up our boots
 ~funny work quote by Thurgood Marshall

   Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions.
 ~work by Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

   Each act is virgin, even the repeated ones.
 ~sayings about work by René Char

   Remedy it, or welcome it: a wise man's only two choices.
 ~quotes about Wise Words by Terri Guillemets

   There's something in every atheist, itching to believe, and something in every believer, itching to doubt.
 ~funny work quote by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   Women who make men talk better than they are accustomed to are always popular.
 ~saying on Women by E.V. Lucas

   The value of identity of course is that so often with it comes purpose.
 ~funny work quote by Richard Grant

   Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it.
 ~work by Thomas Jefferson

   Success means lots discipline. When Rome stopped disciplining, she started dying.
 ~sayings about work by

   Bugs are Sons of Glitches!
 ~quotes about Humor by

   Apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift.
 ~funny work quote by Margaret Lee Runbeck

   Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught.
 ~saying on Integrity by J.C. Watts

   Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
 ~funny work quote by Author Unknown

   There are so many men who can figure costs, and so few who can measure values
 ~work by Author Unknown


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