funny voice mail saying and quotations on voice mail sayings

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funny voice mail saying generated randomly from our collections

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   Learn a new language and get a new soul.
 ~quotes about Language by Czech Proverb

   We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Epictetus

   When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.
 ~saying on Hypocrisy by George Bernard Shaw

   The circumstances of the world are so variable that an irrevocable purpose or opinion is almost synonymous with a foolish one.
 ~funny voice mail saying by William H. Seward

   Homosexuality is god's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children.
 ~voice mail by Sam Austin

   Many persons read and like fiction. It does not tax the intelligence and the intelligence of most of us can so ill afford taxation that we rightly welcome any reading matter which avoids this.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Rose Macaulay

   Nothing there but basketball, a game which won't be fit for people until they set the basket umbilicus-high and return the giraffes to the zoo.
 ~quotes about Basketball by Ogden Nash

   There may be some doubt as to who are the best people to have charge of children, but there can be no doubt that parents are the worst.
 ~funny voice mail saying by George Bernard Shaw

   When a man lies, he murders some part of the world.
 ~saying on Honesty by Rospo Pallenberg and John Boorman, Excalibur, based on Le Morte d'Arthur by Thomas Malory

   We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance
 ~funny voice mail saying by Japanese Proverb

   It was when I found out I could make mistakes that I knew I was on to something.
 ~voice mail by Ornette Coleman

   Women usually love what they buy, yet hate two-thirds of what is in their closets.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.
 ~quotes about Integrity by James D. Miles

   People who have no weaknesses are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Anatole France

   If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive.
 ~saying on Nature by Eleonora Duse

   Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Author Unknown

   There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.
 ~voice mail by Katharine Whitehorn

   But this had been a sin of passion, not of principle, nor even purpose.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter

   Spring makes its own statement, so loud and clear that the gardener seems to be only one of the instruments, not the composer.
 ~quotes about Spring by Geoffrey B. Charlesworth

   Always tell the truth. Even if you have to make it up.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Author Unknown

   Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
 ~saying on Computers by Michael Sinz

   Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Emerson

   Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it.
 ~voice mail by Russel Baker

   Computers, huh? I've heard it all boils down to just a bunch of ones and zeroes.... I don't know how that enables me to see naked women, but however it works, God bless you guys.
 ~sayings about voice mail by From the television show King of Queens (may not be exact wording), spoken by the character Doug Hef

   When I see the Ten Most Wanted Lists... I always have this thought: If we'd made them feel wanted earlier, they wouldn't be wanted now.
 ~quotes about Justice by Edie Cantor

   If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Dave Barry

   If you're a gifted flirt, talking about the price of eggs will do as well as any other subject.
 ~saying on Flirtation by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   Adults are obsolete children
 ~funny voice mail saying by Dr. Seuss

   Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke
 ~voice mail by Lynda Barry

   No Man Alive has witness struggles i survived
 ~sayings about voice mail by Tupac Shakur

   If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden
 ~quotes about Thinking of You by Attributed to Claudia Ghandi

   It is better to drink of deep griefs than to taste shallow pleasures
 ~funny voice mail saying by William Hazlitt, Characteristics, 1823

   The greater part of my official time is spent on investigating collisions between propelled vehicles, each on its own side of the road, each sounding its horn, and each stationary.
 ~saying on Driving by An English Lord Chief Justice, quoted in 2,715 One-Line Quotations for Speakers, Writers & Raconteur

   The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Author Unknown

   Chop your own wood, and it will warm you twice.
 ~voice mail by Henry Ford

   Summing up, it is clear the future holds great opportunities. It also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to avoid the pitfalls, seize the opportunities, and get back home by six o'clock.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Woody Allen, My Speech to the Graduates, Side Effects, 1980

   One's own self is well hidden from one's own self; of all mines of treasure, one's own is the last to be dug up.
 ~quotes about Self-Discovery by Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

   Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun
 ~funny voice mail saying by Jim Bishop

   I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.
 ~saying on Personality by Albert Einstein

   We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Japanese Proverb

   To kill a man is not to defend a doctrine, but to kill a man.
 ~voice mail by Michael Servetus

   Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia
 ~sayings about voice mail by Judith Viorst, Redbook, 1975

   Friends are God's way of taking care of us. If you should die before me, ask if you could bring a friend
 ~quotes about Friends by Stone Temple Pilots

   the silence that guards the tomb does not reveal God's secret in the obscurity of the coffin, and the rustling of the branches whose roots suck the body's elements do not tell the mysteries of the grave, by the agonized sighs of my heart announce to the living the drama which love, beauty, and death have performed
 ~funny voice mail saying by Kahlil Gibran

   You are educatedYour certification is in your degreeYou may think of it as the ticket to the good lifeLet me ask you to think of an alternativeThink of it as your ticket to change the world
 ~saying on Graduation by Tom Brokaw

   A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Peter De Vries

   It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home.
 ~voice mail by Carl T. Rowan

   If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater... suggest that he wear a tail.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Fran Lebowitz

   I'm a supporter of gay rights. And not a closet supporter either. From the time I was a kid, I have never been able to understand attacks upon the gay community. There are so many qualities that make up a human being... by the time I get through with all the things that I really admire about people, what they do with their private parts is probably so low on the list that it is irrelevant.
 ~quotes about Homosexuality by Paul Newman

   A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Doug Larson

   Enthusiasm moves the world.
 ~saying on Enthusiasm by Arthur James Balfour

   The truth is more important than the facts.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Frank Lloyd Wright

   A poet's work is to name the unnameable, to point at frauds, to take sides, start arguments, shape the world, and stop it going to sleep.
 ~voice mail by Salman Rushdie

   To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right.
 ~sayings about voice mail by Confucius

   Good manners can replace morals. It may be years before anyone knows if what you are doing is right. But if what you are doing is nice, it will be immediately evident.
 ~quotes about Manners by P.J. O'Rourke

   It is a sad fact about our culture that a poet can earn much more money writing or talking about his art than he can by practicing it.
 ~funny voice mail saying by W.H. Auden

   Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain.
 ~saying on Weather by Author Unknown

   Wisdom outweighs any wealth.
 ~funny voice mail saying by Sophocles

   If love can't cure it, nurses can.
 ~voice mail by Author Unknown


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