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funny quotes on shirt generated randomly from our collections

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   It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son to die a bachelor regards celibacy as an actual sin.
 ~quotes about Religion by H.L. Mencken

   Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Gail Godwin

   Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
 ~saying on America by Gore Vidal

   What we commonly call death does not destroy the body, it only causes a separation of spirit and body
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Brigham Young

   Every character has an inward spring; let Christ be that spring. Every action has a keynote; let Christ be that note, to which your whole life is attuned.
 ~shirt by Henry Drummond

   The best inheritance a person can give to his children is a few minutes of his time each day
 ~sayings about shirt by O. A. Battista

   We need - and should encourage and honour - not only discoverers of facts hitherto unknown but explorers of ideas and rethinkers of values.
 ~quotes about Conformity by Walter Moberly, The Crisis in the University

   As long as you think the problem is out there, that very thought is the problem.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Stephen Covey

   A blessed companion is a book, - a book that, fitly chosen, is a lifelong friend,... a book that, at a touch, pours its heart into our own.
 ~saying on Books Reading by Douglas Jerrold

   It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Dick Cheney

   There are ten church members by inheritance for every one by conviction.
 ~shirt by Unknown

   We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.
 ~sayings about shirt by George Bernard Shaw, Candida, 1898

   The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent
 ~quotes about Grandparents Day by Sam Levenson, You Don't Have to Be in "Who's Who" to Know What's What

   It is our job to make women unhappy with what they have.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by B. Earl Puckett, quoted in Stephen Donadio, The New York Public Library: Book of Twentieth-Century A

   We do not remember days; we remember moments.
 ~saying on Memory by Cesare Pavese, The Burning Brand

   In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Christopher Morley

   The function of education is to help you from childhood not to imitate anybody, but be yourself all the time
 ~shirt by Jiddu Krishnamurti

   If the past cannot teach the present and the father cannot teach the son, then history need not have bothered to go on, and the world has wasted a great deal of time.
 ~sayings about shirt by Russell Hoban

   He that is good with a hammer tends to think everything is a nail.
 ~quotes about Attitude by Abraham H. Maslow

   I am what the librarians have made me with a little assistance from a professor of Greek and a few poets.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Bernard Keble Sandwell

   Prejudices are the chains forged by ignorance to keep men apart.
 ~saying on Prejudice by Countess of Blessington

   Never ruin an apology with an excuse
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Kimberly Johnson

   Originally marriage meant the sale of a woman by one man to another; now most women sell themselves though they have no intention of delivering the goods listed in the bill of sale.
 ~shirt by Robert Graves

   Smoking is pulmonary rape.
 ~sayings about shirt by Author Unknown

   Sunday school: a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.
 ~quotes about Religion by H.L. Mencken

   If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Lawrence J. Peter

   None of us got where we are solely by pulling ourselves up by our bootstrapsWe got here because somebody - a parent, a teacher, an Ivy League crony or a few nuns - bent down and helped us pick up our boots
 ~saying on Teacher Appreciation by Thurgood Marshall

   Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

   Each act is virgin, even the repeated ones.
 ~shirt by René Char

   Remedy it, or welcome it: a wise man's only two choices.
 ~sayings about shirt by Terri Guillemets

   There's something in every atheist, itching to believe, and something in every believer, itching to doubt.
 ~quotes about Religion by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   Women who make men talk better than they are accustomed to are always popular.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by E.V. Lucas

   The value of identity of course is that so often with it comes purpose.
 ~saying on Self-Discovery by Richard Grant

   Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Thomas Jefferson

   Success means lots discipline. When Rome stopped disciplining, she started dying.
 ~shirt by

   Bugs are Sons of Glitches!
 ~sayings about shirt by

   Apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift.
 ~quotes about Apologies by Margaret Lee Runbeck

   Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by J.C. Watts

   Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
 ~saying on War by Author Unknown

   There are so many men who can figure costs, and so few who can measure values
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Author Unknown

   You can't wring your hands and roll up your sleeves at the same time.
 ~shirt by Pat Schroeder

   Journalism is organized gossip.
 ~sayings about shirt by Edward Egglestone

   Probably no man ever had a friend that he did not dislike a little.
 ~quotes about Friendship by E.W. Howe

   We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

   It may be that all games are silly. But then, so are humans.
 ~saying on Sports by Robert Lynd

   An artist is someone who produces things that people don't need to have but that he - for some reason - thinks it would be a good idea to give them.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Andy Warhol

   To many people virtue consists chiefly in repenting faults, not in avoiding them.
 ~shirt by Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

   Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.
 ~sayings about shirt by Pam Brown

   Our grandchildren accept us for ourselves, without rebuke or effort to change us, as no one in our entire lives has ever done, not our parents, siblings, spouses, friends - and hardly ever our own grown children.
 ~quotes about Grandparents by Ruth Goode

   Modesty is the gentle art of enhancing your charm by pretending not to be aware of it.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Oliver Herford

   Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance.
 ~saying on Confidence by Bruce Barton

   The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Joe Houldsworth

   Without forgiveness life is governed by... an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation.
 ~shirt by Roberto Assagioli

   There are books so alive that you're always afraid that while you weren't reading, the book has gone and changed, has shifted like a river; while you went on living, it went on living too, and like a river moved on and moved away. No one has stepped twice into the same river. But did anyone ever step twice into the same book?
 ~sayings about shirt by Marina Tsvetaeva

   Man - despite his artistic pretensions, his sophistication, and his many accomplishments - owes his existence to a six inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.
 ~quotes about Civilization by Author Unknown

   To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Ken S. Keyes, Jr., Handbook to Higher Consciousness

   A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her.
 ~saying on Confidence by David Brinkley

   No one can get inner peace by pouncing on it.
 ~funny quotes on shirt by Harry Emerson Fosdick

   Courage is as often the outcome of despair as of hope; in the one case we have nothing to lose, in the other everything to gain.
 ~shirt by Diane de Poitiers


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