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funny quotes for teens generated randomly from our collections

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   There's a bit of magic in everything, and some loss to even things out.
 ~quotes about Grief by Lou Reed, Magic and Loss

   If my love to you can't be said in a posy, it can't be said in a library.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Grey Livingston

   [T]hen I did the simplest thing in the world. I leaned down... and kissed him. And the world cracked open.
 ~saying on Kisses by Agnes de Mille

   Well, I will find you twenty lascivious turtles ere one chaste man.
 ~funny quotes for teens by William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor, 1601

   A Christmas gambol oft could cheer The poor man's heart through half the year.
 ~teens by Walter Scott

   The best way to catch a knuckleball is to wait until the ball stops rolling and then pick it up.
 ~sayings about teens by Bob Uecker

   The only liberty an inferior man really cherishes is the liberty to quit work, stretch out in the sun, and scratch himself
 ~quotes about Labor Day by H.L. Mencken

   Only the wise can dance the rhythm of life
 ~funny quotes for teens by Unknown

   Happiness is like the penny candy of our youth: we got a lot more for our money back when we had no money.
 ~saying on Happiness by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   A barking dog is often more useful than a sleeping lion.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Washington Irving, adapted from a verse in the Bible

   We are not hypocrites in our sleep.
 ~teens by William Hazlitt

   No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her crap.
 ~sayings about teens by Author Unknown

   I expect to pass through life but onceIf therefore, there be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again
 ~quotes about Sweetest Day by William Penn

   The Lord's Prayer is 66 words, the Gettysburg Address is 286 words, there are 1,322 words in the Declaration of Independence, but government regulations on the sale of cabbage total 26,911 words.
 ~funny quotes for teens by National Review

   For every dark night, there's a brighter day
 ~saying on Living by Tupac Shakur

   Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Dr. Alexis Carrel

   The reason for much matrimony is patrimony.
 ~teens by Ogden Nash

   Hunting God is a great adventure.
 ~sayings about teens by Marie DeFloris

   Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.
 ~quotes about Anger by Albert Einstein

   Hugging has no unpleasant side effects and is all natural. There are no batteries to replace, it's inflation-proof and non-fattening with no monthly payments. It's non-taxable, non-polluting, and is, of course, fully refundable.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Author Unknown

   The younger brother must help to pay for the pleasures of the elder.
 ~saying on Brothers by Jane Austen, Mansfield Park

   Nature made us individuals, as she did the flowers and the pebbles; but we are afraid to be peculiar, and so our society resembles a bag of marbles, or a string of mold candles. Why should we all dress after the same fashion? The frost never paints my windows twice alike.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Lydia Maria Child

   There are souls in this world which have the gift of finding joy everywhere and of leaving it behind them when they go.
 ~teens by Frederick Faber

   The cigarette is a portable therapist.
 ~sayings about teens by Terri Guillemets

   A lake is the landscape's most beautiful and expressive feature. It is earth's eye; looking into which the beholder measures the depth of his own nature.
 ~quotes about Water by Henry David Thoreau

   I asked Ring Lardner the other day how he writes his short stories, and he said he wrote a few widely separated words or phrases on a piece of paper and then went back and filled in the spaces.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Harold Ross

   Won't you come into the garden? I would like my roses to see you.
 ~saying on Perspective by Richard Brinsley Sheridan

   Can miles truly separate you from friends.... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there?
 ~funny quotes for teens by Richard Bach

   Thrift means that you should always have the best you can possibly afford, when the thing has any reference to your physical and mental health, to your growth in efficiency and power.
 ~teens by Orison Swett Marden

   Winter is the time of promise because there is so little to do - or because you can now and then permit yourself the luxury of thinking so.
 ~sayings about teens by Stanley Crawford

   Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart
 ~quotes about Missing You by Kay Knudsen

   To infinity, and beyond!" Tim Allen (Buzz Lightyear) in Toy Story
 ~funny quotes for teens by Story

   Anyone who can be replaced by a machine deserves to be.
 ~saying on Imagination by Dennis Gunton

   The beauty is that people often come here for the stretch, and leave with a lot more.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Liza Ciano, co-owner & co-director of Yoga Vermont

   Your Business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
 ~teens by Scott Adams

   Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn't have anything to do with it.
 ~sayings about teens by Haim Ginott

   First build a proper goal; that goal will make it EASY, ALMOST AUTOMATIC, to build a proper you. Striving for a goal develops all the means needed to reach it.
 ~quotes about Goals by

   No poems can please for long or live that are written by water-drinkers.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus), Satires

   There is more felicity on the far side of baldness than young men can possibly imagine.
 ~saying on Age by Logan Pearsall Smith

   The highest virtue here may be least in another world.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Kahlil Gibran

   I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.
 ~teens by Eleanor Roosevelt

   God be thanked for books! they are the voices of the distant and the dead, and make us heirs of the spiritual life of past ages.
 ~sayings about teens by W.E. Channing

   History will see advertising as one of the real evil things of our time. It is stimulating people constantly to want things, want this, want that.
 ~quotes about Advertising by Malcolm Muggeridge, quoted in Eric Clark, The Want Makers: Inside the World of Advertising, 1988

   There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
 ~funny quotes for teens by George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997

   I soon realized that no journey carries one far unless, as it extends into the world around us, it goes an equal distance into the world within.
 ~saying on Travel by Lillian Smith

   In overcoming prejudice, working together is even more effective than talking together.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Ralph W. Sockman

   A wonderful discovery, psychoanalysis. Makes quite simple people feel they're complex.
 ~teens by S.N. Behrman

   As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words
 ~sayings about teens by William Shakespeare

   The only way to have a life is to commit to it like crazy.
 ~quotes about Life by Angelina Jolie

   I always tried to make clear that basketball is not the ultimate. It is of small importance in comparison to the total life we live. There is only one kind of life that truly wins, and that is the one that places faith in the hands of the Savior. Until that is done, we are on an aimless course that runs in circles and goes nowhere
 ~funny quotes for teens by John Wooden

   Leisure time is that five or six hours when you sleep at night.
 ~saying on Sleep by George Allen

   The dog is a yes-animal, very popular with people who can't afford to keep a yes-man.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Robertson Davies

   To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.
 ~teens by Oscar Wilde

   It just wouldn't be a picnic without the ants.
 ~sayings about teens by Author Unknown

   With all the mass media concentrated in a few hands, the ancient faith in the competition of ideas in the free market seems like a hollow echo of a much simpler day.
 ~quotes about Media Journalism by Kingman Brewster, Jr.

   If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
 ~funny quotes for teens by Author Unknown

   Kittens can happen to anyone.
 ~saying on Cats by Paul Gallico

   There is a temperate zone in the mind, between luxurious indolence and exacting work; and it is to this region, just between laziness and labor, that summer reading belongs.
 ~funny quotes for teens by Henry Ward Beecher

   As for food, half of my friends have dug their graves with their teeth.
 ~teens by Chauncey M. Depew


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