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funny quote about guys generated randomly from our collections

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   There is poetry as soon as we realize that we possess nothing.
 ~quotes about Poetry by John Cage

   It's easy to understand love at first sight, but how do we explain love after two people have been looking at each other for years?
 ~funny quote about guys by Author Unknown

   We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love
 ~saying on Weddings by Author Unknown

   It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument.
 ~funny quote about guys by William G. McAdoo

   Difficult things take a long time, impossible things a little longer.
 ~guys by Author Unknown

   We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance.
 ~sayings about guys by Japanese Proverb

   Ask me why I keep on loving you when it's clear that you don't feel the same way for me... the problem is that as much as I can't force you to love me, I can't force myself to stop loving you.
 ~quotes about Heartache by Author Unknown

   A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.
 ~funny quote about guys by Joan Rivers

   I hate to be near the sea, and to hear it raging and roaring like a wild beast in its den. It puts me in mind of the everlasting efforts of the human mind, struggling to be free and ending just where it began.
 ~saying on Curmudgeons by William Hazlitt

   Men lose more conquests by their own awkwardness than by any virtue in the woman.
 ~funny quote about guys by Ninon de Lenclos

   Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
 ~guys by Woody Allen

   Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end; then stop.
 ~sayings about guys by Lewis Carrol, Alice in Wonderland

   Those parts of the system that you can hit with a hammer (not advised) are called hardware; those program instructions that you can only curse at are called software.
 ~quotes about Computers by Author Unknown

   I'm fanatical about sport: there seems to me something almost religious about the fact that human beings can organise play, the spirit of play.
 ~funny quote about guys by Simon Gray, 1995

   There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it.
 ~saying on Religion by George Bernard Shaw

   Take care of the earth and she will take care of you.
 ~funny quote about guys by Author Unknown

   Are we not like two volumes of one book?
 ~guys by Marceline Desbordes-Valmore

   It is a wise father that knows his own child
 ~sayings about guys by William Shakespeare

   Never write a letter while you are angry.
 ~quotes about Letters by Chinese Proverb

   In composing, as a general rule, run your pen through every other word you have written; you have no idea what vigor it will give your style.
 ~funny quote about guys by Sydney Smith

   Lighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue.
 ~saying on Women by Hermione Gingold

   A gifted small girl has explained that pins are a great means of saving life, by not swallowing them.
 ~funny quote about guys by Charles Edward Montague, Dramatic Values

   My language is the common prostitute that I turn into a virgin.
 ~guys by Karl Kraus

   Those who make the worst use of their time most complain of its brevity.
 ~sayings about guys by Jean de La Bruyere

   On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.
 ~quotes about Funny Quotes by Woody Allen

   People see God every day, they just don't recognize him.
 ~funny quote about guys by Pearl Bailey

   One joy scatters a hundred griefs.
 ~saying on Happiness by Chinese Proverb

   There is no personal charm so great as the charm of a cheerful temperament.
 ~funny quote about guys by Henry Van Dyke

   What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part of the game.... There is no reason why the field should not try to put the batsman off his stroke at the critical moment by neatly timed disparagements of his wife's fidelity and his mother's respectability.
 ~guys by George Bernard Shaw

   A hunter of shadows, himself a shade.
 ~sayings about guys by Homer

   If you sincerely desire a truly well-rounded education, you must study the extremists, the obscure and nutty. You need the balance! Your poor brain is already being impregnated with middle-of-the-road crap, twenty-four hours a day, no matter what. Network TV, newspapers, radio, magazines at the supermarket... even if you never watch, read, listen, or leave your house, even if you are deaf and blind, the telepathic pressure alone of the uncountable normals surrounding you will insure that you are automatically well-grounded in consensus reality.
 ~quotes about Education by Rev. Ivan Stang, High Weirdness By Mail

   I doubt if anything learnt at school is of more value than great literature learnt by heart.
 ~funny quote about guys by Richard Livingstone

   Music, once admitted to the soul, becomes a sort of spirit, and never dies.
 ~saying on Music by Edward George Bulwer-Lytton

   No one is a firmer believer in the power of prayer than the devil; not that he practices it, but he suffers from it.
 ~funny quote about guys by Guy H. King

   Only on paper has humanity yet achieved glory, beauty, truth, knowledge, virtue, and abiding love.
 ~guys by George Bernard Shaw

   Me thinks that the moment my legs begin to move, my thoughts begin to flow.
 ~sayings about guys by Henry David Thoreau

   Who well lives, long lives; for this age of ours should not be numbered by years, days, and hours.
 ~quotes about Carpe Diem by Guillaume de Salluste Du Bartas, Divine Weeks and Works, 1578

   When I was 40, my doctor advised me that a man in his 40s shouldn't play tennis. I heeded his advice carefully and could hardly wait until I reached 50 to start again.
 ~funny quote about guys by Hugo L. Black

   War is not an adventure. It is a disease. It is like typhus.
 ~saying on War by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

   Why does a person even get up in the morning? You have breakfast, you floss your teeth so you'll have healthy gums in your old age, and then you get in your car and drive down I-10 and die. Life is so stupid I can't stand it.
 ~funny quote about guys by Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

   Short as life is, we make it shorter by wasting time.
 ~guys by

   If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be meetings.
 ~sayings about guys by Dave Barry, Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn

   God is the perfect poet.
 ~quotes about God by Robert Browning

   If fame were based on kindness instead of popularity, on understanding and not on worldwide attention, you would be the biggest celebrity on earth. And to my heart, you already are.
 ~funny quote about guys by Anonymous

   Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
 ~saying on Age by Author Unknown

   If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.
 ~funny quote about guys by Vince Lombardi

   Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to continually be part of unanimity.
 ~guys by Christopher Morley

   He that has energy enough to root out a vice should go further, and try to plant a virtue in its place.
 ~sayings about guys by Charles Caleb Colton

   Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends
 ~quotes about Cute by Laurie Kuslansky

   Time is the fire in which we burn.
 ~funny quote about guys by Delmore Schwartz, Calmly We Walk Through This April's Day, 1937 (Thank you, George.)

   Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
 ~saying on Living by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   Just as pieces stitched together in a quilt warm our bodies, scrapbooks bind together memories to warm our hearts.
 ~funny quote about guys by Author Unknown

   Dictionaries are like watches; the worst is better than none, and the best cannot be expected to go quite true.
 ~guys by Samuel Johnson

   If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
 ~sayings about guys by Mark Twain

   No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
 ~quotes about Society by Dave Barry, Dave Barry Turns 50

   No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious.
 ~funny quote about guys by George Bernard Shaw

   It is proof of high culture to say the greatest matters in the simplest way.
 ~saying on Compassion by Emerson

   Things are not as bad as they seem. They are worse.
 ~funny quote about guys by Bill Press

   The Bible is literature, not dogma.
 ~guys by George Santayana


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