funny one line sayings and quotations on one line sayings

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funny one line sayings generated randomly from our collections

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   There is certainly something in angling that tends to produce a serenity of the mind.
 ~quotes about Fishing by Washington Irving

   Worry is like a rocking chair, it will give you something to do, but it won't get you anywhere
 ~funny one line sayings by Unknown

   There is one quality more important than know-how and we cannot accuse the United States of any undue amount of it. This is know-what by which we determine not only how to accomplish our purposes, but what our purposes are to be.
 ~saying on Goals by Norbert Wiener, The Human Use of Human Beings, 1954

   The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism
 ~funny one line sayings by Norman Vincent Peale

   I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.
 ~one line by Oscar Levant

   During the feminist revolution, the battle lines were again simple. It was easy to tell the enemy, he was the one with the penis. This is no longer strictly true. Some men are okay now. We're allowed to like them again. We still have to keep them in line, of course, but we no longer have to shoot them on sight.
 ~sayings about one line by Cynthia Heimel, Sex Tips for Girls, 1983

   It is the nature of mortals to kick a fallen man.
 ~quotes about Humankind by Aeschylus, Agamemnon

   New York has a trip-hammer vitality which drives you insane with restlessness if you have no inner stabilizer.
 ~funny one line sayings by Henry Miller

   A truly great library contains something in it to offend everyone.
 ~saying on Libraries by Jo Godwin

   Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving.
 ~funny one line sayings by David Letterman

   Everything in life is somewhere else, and you get there in a car.
 ~one line by E.B. White, One Man's Meat, 1943

   The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch with, never saying a word, and walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you've had
 ~sayings about one line by Author Unknown

   I am not impressed by the Ivy League establishments. Of course they graduate the best - it's all they'll take, leaving to others the problem of educating the country. They will give you an education the way the banks will give you money - provided you can prove to their satisfaction that you don't need it.
 ~quotes about College by Peter DeVries

   Love is my religion - I could die for it.
 ~funny one line sayings by John Keats

   A mind always employed is always happy. This is the true secret, the grand recipe, for felicity.
 ~saying on Labor by Thomas Jefferson

   Hardship is best sailed with a heart ship
 ~funny one line sayings by Terri Guillemets, Dream Quotes: The Imprisoned Writer Speaks at Night

   Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood.
 ~one line by T.S. Eliot, Dante, 1920

   What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive.
 ~sayings about one line by Arnold Palmer

   If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.
 ~quotes about Worry by Don Herold

   How many pessimists end up by desiring the things they fear, in order to prove that they are right?
 ~funny one line sayings by Robert Mallett, Apostilles, 1972

   The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
 ~saying on Golf by Will Rogers

   The best-dressed woman is one whose clothes wouldn't look too strange in the country.
 ~funny one line sayings by Hardy Amies

   To give and then not feel that one has given is the very best of all ways of giving.
 ~one line by Max Beerbohm

   Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius
 ~sayings about one line by Mozart

   Pick my left pocket of its silver dime, but spare the right - it holds my golden time!
 ~quotes about Time by Oliver Wendell Holmes

   To do nothing is sometimes a good remedy.
 ~funny one line sayings by Hippocrates

   It is only rarely that one can see in a little boy the promise of a man, but one can almost always see in a little girl the threat of a woman.
 ~saying on Women by Alexandre Dumas, fils

   Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.

 ~funny one line sayings by W.W. Ziege

   Fishing tournaments seem a little like playing tennis with living balls...
 ~one line by Jim Harrison, Just Before Dark, 1991

   A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.
 ~sayings about one line by Henny Youngman

   Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up.
 ~quotes about Life by Author Unknown

   The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between political parties either - but right through every human heart.
 ~funny one line sayings by Alexander Solzhenitsyn

   Not ignorance, but ignorance of ignorance, is the death of knowledge.
 ~saying on Ignorance by Alfred North Whitehead

   What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money
 ~funny one line sayings by Henny Youngman

   The only way to read a book of aphorisms without being bored is to open it at random and, having found something that interests you, close the book and meditate.
 ~one line by Prince de Ligne

   Art is a shadow of what a person is thinking... a small glimpse of what they hold inside. Little secrets, regrets, joys... every line has its own meaning.
 ~sayings about one line by Sarah, Los Cerros Middle School, 1999

   If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he comes next to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination
 ~quotes about Drinking by Thomas De Quincey

   To a man with an empty stomach food is God.
 ~funny one line sayings by Gandhi

   Among provocatives, the next best thing to good preaching is bad preaching. I have even more thoughts during or enduring it than at other times.
 ~saying on Speaking by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   It seems to me that those songs that have been any good, I have nothing much to do with the writing of them. The words have just crawled down my sleeve and come out on the page.
 ~funny one line sayings by Joan Baez

   Those who believe that they believe in God, but without passion in their hearts, without anguish in mind, without uncertainty, without doubt, without an element of despair even in their consolation, believe in the God idea, not God himself.
 ~one line by Miguel de Unamuno

   Every difficulty postponed becomes greater later. Each victory makes the next one easier.
 ~sayings about one line by

   My father, when he went, made my childhood a gift of a half a century.
 ~quotes about Fathers by Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

   you have to be yourself. be very honest about who and what you are. if people still like you thats fine. if they dont thats their problem.
 ~funny one line sayings by Sting

   Between saying and doing many a pair of shoes is worn out.
 ~saying on Action by Italian Proverb

   Nothing so much prevents our being natural as the desire to seem so.
 ~funny one line sayings by François, Duc de La Rochefoucauld, Maxims, 1678

   If the world seems cold to you, kindle fires to warm it.
 ~one line by Lucy Larcom

   In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.
 ~sayings about one line by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value. Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point - that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you. There is only one alternative - self-value. If you cannot love yourself, you will not believe that you are loved. You will always think it's a mistake or luck. Take your eyes off others and turn the scanner within. Find the seeds of your jealousy, clear the old voices and experiences. Put all the energy into building your personal and emotional security. Then you will be the one others envy, and you can remember the pain and reach out to them.
 ~quotes about Jealousy by Jennifer James

   Whatever we worship, short of God, is sure to be our undoing.
 ~funny one line sayings by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   The amount you laugh in your relationships with others is the true measure of the health of your personality.
 ~saying on Humor by Brian Tracy

   Hormones, vitamines, stimulants and depressives are oils upon the creaky machinery of life. Principal item, however, is the machinery.
 ~funny one line sayings by Martin H. Fischer

   A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
 ~one line by Michel de Montaigne, Essays

   Parenthood is a lot easier to get into than out of.
 ~sayings about one line by Bruce Lansky

   But, logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities.
 ~quotes about Logic by Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett Dunsany, Weeds & Moss, My Ireland

   You know you're an Arizona native when you think Taco Bell is the local phone company.
 ~funny one line sayings by Emma Louise Philabaum, quoted in You Know You're an Arizona Native, When... compiled by Don Dedera,

   Learn all you can from the mistakes of others. You won't have time to make them all yourself.
 ~saying on Experience. by Alfred Sheinwold

   No single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
 ~funny one line sayings by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Flight to Arras, 1942, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

   It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.
 ~one line by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


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