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funny office quote generated randomly from our collections

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   I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty or give me death
 ~quotes about Death by Patrick Henry

   The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
 ~funny office quote by Jacqueline Schiff

   To my mind, the life of a lamb is no less precious than that of a human being. I should be unwilling to take the life of a lamb for the sake of the human body.
 ~saying on Vegetarianism by Mahatma Gandhi

   The author of the Iliad is either Homer or, if not Homer, somebody else of the same name.
 ~funny office quote by Aldous Huxley

   The mere chink of cups and saucers tunes the mind to happy repose.
 ~office by George Gissing, The Private Papers of Henry Ryecroft

   Wherever a man turns he can find someone who needs him
 ~sayings about office by Albert Schweitzer

   A leader leads by example, whether he intends to or not.
 ~quotes about Leadership by Author Unknown

   The winds that blow through the wide sky in these mounts, the winds that sweep from Canada to Mexico, from the Pacific to the Atlantic - have always blown on free men.
 ~funny office quote by Franklin D. Roosevelt

   Beauty in the flesh will continue to rule the world.
 ~saying on Beauty by Florenz Ziegfeld

   One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters.
 ~funny office quote by George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640

   As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.
 ~office by Mel Brooks

   Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
 ~sayings about office by Josh Billings

   We must care for each other more, and tax each other less.
 ~quotes about Taxes by Bill Archer

   The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
 ~funny office quote by Charles Du Bos

   The war between being and nothingness is the underlying illness of the twentieth century. Boredom slays more of existence than war.
 ~saying on Boredom by Norman Mailer

   What a lucky thing the wheel was invented before the automobile; otherwise can you imagine the awful screeching?
 ~funny office quote by Samuel Hoffenstein

   Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
 ~office by Oliver Wendell Holmes

   On rare occasions one does hear of a miraculous case of a married couple falling in love after marriage, but on close examination it will be found that it is a mere adjustment to the inevitable.
 ~sayings about office by Emma Goldman, Marriage and Love

   A true friend is the greatest possesion.
 ~quotes about Friendship by Ben Franklin

   Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf
 ~funny office quote by Gene Perret

   The Ancient Mariner would not have taken so well if it had been called The Old Sailor.
 ~saying on Language by Samuel Butler

   There is more difference within the sexes than between them.
 ~funny office quote by Ivy Compton-Burnett, Mother and Son

   Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship--never
 ~office by Charles Caleb Colton

   Adversity is like a strong windIt tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are
 ~sayings about office by Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha

   If you came and you found a strange man... teaching your kids to punch each other, or trying to sell them all kinds of products, you'd kick him right out of the house, but here you are; you come in and the TV is on, and you don't think twice about it.
 ~quotes about Television by Jerome Singer

   Let my lusts be my ruin, then, since all else is a fake and a mockery.
 ~funny office quote by Hart Crane

   My adolescence progressed normally: enough misery to keep the death wish my usual state, an occasional high to keep me from actually taking the gas-pipe.
 ~saying on Teenagers by Faye Moskowitz

   Wealth - any income that is at least one hundred dollars more a year than the income of one's wife's sister's husband.
 ~funny office quote by H.L. Mencken

   It is much easier to become a father than to be one.
 ~office by Kent Nerburn, Letters to My Son: Reflections on Becoming a Man, 1994

   Most people wish to serve God - but only in an advisory capacity.
 ~sayings about office by Author Unknown

   If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice
 ~quotes about Thanksgiving Day by Meister Eckhart

   When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows.
 ~funny office quote by Frederike Ryder

   DoN't FiNd FaULt,FiNd ThE rEmEdY
 ~saying on Attitude by Korn

   There are five things which no one is able to accomplish in this world: first, to cease growing old when he is growing old; second, to cease being sick; third, to cease dying; fourth, to deny dissolution when there is dissolution; fifth, to deny non-being.
 ~funny office quote by Buddha

   If I had learned education I would not have had time to learn anything else.
 ~office by Cornelius Vanderbilt

   Addictions do come in handy sometimes: at least you have to get out of bed for them.
 ~sayings about office by Martin Amis

   Every child begins the world again....
 ~quotes about Baby by Henry David Thoreau

   The indifference, callousness and contempt that so many people exhibit toward animals is evil first because it results in great suffering in animals, and second because it results in an incalculably great impoverishment of the human spirit. All education should be directed toward the refinement of the individual's sensibilities in relation not only to one's fellow humans everywhere, but to all things whatsoever.
 ~funny office quote by Ashley Montague

   If equations are trains threading the landscape of numbers, then no train stops at pi.
 ~saying on Math by Richard Preston

   Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.
 ~funny office quote by Frank McKinney Kin Hubbard

   Trying to hit him (Phil Niekro) was like trying to eat Jell-O with chopsticks
 ~office by Bobby Murcer

   There's opportunity in poker.... If Horace Greeley were alive today, his advice wouldn't be Go West, young man, and grow up with the country. Instead, he'd point to that deck of cards on table and say, Shuffle up and deal.
 ~sayings about office by Lou Krieger

   A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're at home.
 ~quotes about Light by Author Unknown

   Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesbrough
 ~funny office quote by Jonathan Woodgate

   That which is striking and beautiful is not always good, but that which is good is always beautiful.
 ~saying on Beauty by Ninon de L'Enclos

   In youth we are plagued by desire; in later years, by the desire to feel desire.
 ~funny office quote by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   Sweet childish days, that were as long,As twenty days are now.
 ~office by William Wordsworth, To a Butterfly

   Laughter sets the spirit free to move through even the most tragic of circumstances. It helps us shake our heads clear, get our feet back under us, restoring our sense of balance and purpose. Humor is integral to our peace of mind and to our ability to go beyond survival
 ~sayings about office by Captain Gerald Coffee POW in Vietnam for seven years

   Women.... Who made 'em? God must have been a... genius. Their hair. They say that the hair is everything, you know? Have you ever buried your nose in a mountain of curls, and just wanted to go to sleep forever?
 ~quotes about Hair by Bo Goldman, The Start of an Education,made popular by the movie Scent of a Woman

   Joy is a flower that blooms when you do.
 ~funny office quote by Author Unknown

   Baseball is the only game left for people. To play basketball, you have to be 7 feet 6 inches. To play football, you have to be the same width.
 ~saying on Baseball by Bill Veeck, 1975

   You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going
 ~funny office quote by P. J. O'Rourke

   Mirrors should think longer before they reflect.
 ~office by Jean Cocteau

   The state calls its own violence law, but that of the individual crime.
 ~sayings about office by Max Stirner, The Ego and His Own

   No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth
 ~quotes about Missing You by Robert Southey

   Modern cynics and skeptics... see no harm in paying those to whom they entrust the minds of their children a smaller wage than is paid to those to whom they entrust the care of their plumbing.
 ~funny office quote by John F. Kennedy

   The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch with, never saying a word, and walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you've had.
 ~saying on Friendship by Author Unknown

   Every major horror of history was committed in the name of an altruistic motive. Has any act of selfishness ever equaled the carnage perpetrated by disciples of altruism?
 ~funny office quote by Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead

   To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.
 ~office by Jack Handey


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