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funny marriage quotes generated randomly from our collections

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   Anything simple always interests me.
 ~quotes about Simplicity by David Hockney

   Sin is geographical.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Bertrand Russell

   A handful of pine-seed will cover mountains with the green majesty of a forest. I too will set my face to the wind and throw my handful of seed on high.
 ~saying on Helping by Fiona MacLeod

   That which distinguishes this day from all others is that then both orators and artillerymen shoot blank cartridges
 ~funny marriage quotes by John Burroughs, Journal

   She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
 ~marriage by Mae West

   One has to secrete a jelly in which to slip quotations down people's throats and one always secretes too much jelly.
 ~sayings about marriage by Virginia Woolf

   Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army.
 ~quotes about Education by Edward Everett

   Astronomers always work in the past; because light takes time to move from one place to another, they see things as they were, not as they are.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Neale E. Howard, The Telescope Handbook and Star Atlas, 1967

   Teachers who inspire realize there will always be rocks in the road ahead of us. They will be stumbling blocks or stepping stones; it all depends on how we use them.
 ~saying on Teachers by Author Unknown

   The only interesting answers are those which destroy the questions.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Susan Sontag

   While one person hesitates because he feels inferior, the other is busy making mistakes and becoming superior.
 ~marriage by Henry C. Link

   Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel.
 ~sayings about marriage by Gilbert Keith Chesterton, Orthodoxy, 1909

   A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill.
 ~quotes about Medical by Martin H. Fischer

   We are sure to be losers when we quarrel with ourselves; it is civil war.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Charles Caleb Colton

   Every sweet has its sour; every evil its good.
 ~saying on Attitude by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   Health - what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Phyllis Diller

   It always seemed to me that men wore their beards, like they wear their neckties, for show.
 ~marriage by D.H. Lawrence

   Two things I dislike about my granddaughter - when she won't take her afternoon nap, and when she won't let me take mine.
 ~sayings about marriage by Gene Perret

   In summer, the song sings itself.
 ~quotes about Summer by William Carlos Williams

   Liberty is the breath of life to nations
 ~funny marriage quotes by George Bernard Shaw

   Good for the body is the work of the body, good for the soul the work of the soul, and good for either the work of the other.
 ~saying on Body by Henry David Thoreau

   The laws of nature are but the mathematical thoughts of God.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Euclid

   The field of consciousness is tiny. It accepts only one problem at a time.
 ~marriage by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

   I've reached the age where competence is a turn-on.
 ~sayings about marriage by Billy Joel

   I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
 ~quotes about Anger by Author Unknown

   God understands our prayers even when we can't find the words to say them.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Author Unknown

   Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true
 ~saying on Dreams by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   Jealousy is no more than feeling alone against smiling enemies.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Elizabeth Bowen

   How can you put on a meaningful drama when, every fifteen minutes, proceedings are interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper?
 ~marriage by Rod Serling, quoted in Submitted for Your Approval, Public Broadcasting Station, 1995

   If the Stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore; and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! But every night come out these envoys of beauty, and light the universe with their admonishing smile.
 ~sayings about marriage by Ralph Waldo Emerson

   The tyrant dies and his rule ends, the martyr dies and his rule begins.
 ~quotes about Perspective by Soren Kierkegaard

   Every happening, great and small, is a parable whereby God speaks to us, and the art of life is to get the message.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Malcolm Muggeridge

   Every one of us has in him a continent of undiscovered character. Blessed is he who acts the Columbus to his own soul.
 ~saying on Self-Discovery by Author Unknown

   Great experience are even better when they are share!
 ~funny marriage quotes by Calvin

   Are you not ashamed of heaping up the greatest amount of money and honour and reputation, and caring so little about wisdom and truth and the greatest improvement of the soul?
 ~marriage by Socrates

   Every hitter likes fastballs, just like everybody likes ice cream. But you don't like it when someone's stuffing it into you by the gallon. That's what it feels like when Nolan Ryan's thrown balls by you.
 ~sayings about marriage by Reggie Jackson

   I know many married men, I even know a few happily married men, but I don't know one who wouldn't fall down the first open coal hole running after the first pretty girl who gave him a wink.
 ~quotes about Men by George Jean Nathan

   The race is not always to the swift nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Damon Runyon, More Than Somewhat, in reference to Ecclesiastes 9:11, I returned, and saw under the s

   A gold medal is a nice thing - but if you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it.
 ~saying on Confidence by From Cool Runnings

   If Jesus Christ were to come today people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he has to say, and make fun of it.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Thomas Carlyle

   There is a great man who makes every man feel small. But the real great man is the man who makes every man feel great.
 ~marriage by G.K. Chesterton

   The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes
 ~sayings about marriage by Marcel Proust

   You can't give a hug without getting a hug.
 ~quotes about Hugs by Author Unknown

   Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime.
 ~funny marriage quotes by George Bernard Shaw, Everybody's Political What's What, 1944

   The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent.
 ~saying on Parenting by Mell Lazarus

   Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Author Unknown

   To learn about eye protection, ask someone who has one.
 ~marriage by Author Unknown

   Tea...is a religion of the art of life.
 ~sayings about marriage by Okakura

   Will... the threat of common extermination continue?... Must children receive the arms race from us as a necessary inheritance?
 ~quotes about War by Pope John Paul II, speech at the UN, 1979

   Water which is too pure has no fish.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Ts'ai Ken T'an

   Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.
 ~saying on Age by Maurice Chevalier, New York Times, 9 October 1960

   Luck: when your burst of energy doesn't run afoul of someone else's.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   History is apt to judge harshly those who sacrifice tomorrow for today.
 ~marriage by Harold MacMillan

   The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
 ~sayings about marriage by Erma Bombeck

   Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought.
 ~quotes about Philosophical by Matsuo Basho

   To win, you've got to put the ball in the macramé.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Terry McGuire

   Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it.
 ~saying on Happiness by Jacques Prévert

   One... gets an impression that civilization is something which was imposed on a resisting majority by a minority which understood how to obtain possession of the means to power and coercion. It is, of course, natural to assume that these difficulties are not inherent in the nature of civilization itself but are determined by the imperfections of the cultural forms which have so far been developed.
 ~funny marriage quotes by Sigmund Freud, The Future of an Illusion

   When red headed people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.
 ~marriage by Mark Twain, A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court


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