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funny graduation quote generated randomly from our collections

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   Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.
 ~quotes about Time by Henry David Thoreau

   History... is, indeed, little more than the register of the 'crimes, follies, and misfortunes' of mankind. But what experience and history teach is this - that peoples and governments have never learned anything from history, or acted on principles deduced from it.
 ~funny graduation quote by Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, The Philosophy of History, Introduction, 1807

   I try not to break the rules, but merely to test their elasticity.
 ~saying on Conformity by Bill Veeck

   Tattooing is about personalizing the body, making it a true home and fit temple for the spirit that dwells inside it.... Tattooing therefore, is a way of keeping the spiritual and material needs of my body in balance.
 ~funny graduation quote by Michelle Delio

   He changed sunset into sunrise.
 ~graduation by Clement of Alexandria

   Chess is a foolish expedient for making idle people believe they are doing something very clever when they are only wasting their time.
 ~sayings about graduation by George Bernard Shaw

   [Christ] does not give [men] light but from moment to moment; the instant He withdraws, all is darkness.... God does not give them a stock of holiness.
 ~quotes about Jesus Christ by Johnn Wesley

   The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.
 ~funny graduation quote by Phyllis Diller

   Sudden acquaintance brings repentance.
 ~saying on Sex by Thomas Fuller

   Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't.
 ~funny graduation quote by Richard Bach

   When two people marry they become in the eyes of the law one person, and that one person is the husband.
 ~graduation by Shana Alexander, State-by-State Guide to Women's Legal Rights, 1975

   You don't have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.
 ~sayings about graduation by Author Unknown

   Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer.
 ~quotes about Friendship by Author Unknown

   My philosophy has always been to help women and men feel comfortable and confident through the clothes they wear
 ~funny graduation quote by Georgio Armani

   Mumps, measles, and puppy love are terrible after twenty.
 ~saying on Love by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   No one should have to dance backward all of their lives.
 ~funny graduation quote by Jill Ruckelshaus

   It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.
 ~graduation by Charles Dickens

   Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
 ~sayings about graduation by Mae West

   Man's feelings are always purest and most glowing in the hour of meeting and of farewell
 ~quotes about Goodbye by Jean Paul Richter

   Our birth is nothing but our death begun.
 ~funny graduation quote by Edward Young, Night Thoughts

   A mind of the calibre of mine cannot derive its nutriment from cows.
 ~saying on Vegetarianism by George Bernard Shaw

   Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion.
 ~funny graduation quote by Miguel de Unamuno

   You cannot endow even the best machine with initiative; the jolliest steam-roller will not plant flowers.
 ~graduation by Walter Lippmann

   Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man. To decide against your conviction is to be an unqualified and excusable traitor, both to yourself and to your country, let me label you as they may.
 ~sayings about graduation by Mark Twain

   He who is outside his door has the hardest part of his journey behind him.
 ~quotes about Effort by Dutch Proverb

   You will always have problems, but you will always have freinds.
 ~funny graduation quote by

   Americans like fat books and thin women.
 ~saying on America by Russell Baker

   My definition [of a philosopher] is of a man up in a balloon, with his family and friends holding the ropes which confine him to earth and trying to haul him down.
 ~funny graduation quote by Louisa May Alcott, in Life, Letters, and Journals, ed. E.D. Cheney, 1889

   A race track is a place where windows clean people.
 ~graduation by Danny Thomas

   Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk.
 ~sayings about graduation by Susan Scarf Merrell

   Life may have no meaning. Or even worse, it may have a meaning of which I disapprove.
 ~quotes about Life by Ashleigh Brilliant

   History is concerned primarily with human phenomena, not with natural; and history is doubly human because, as an idea, it is man's creation, challenging him to transcend the limits of information about himself and to discover what he is by finding meaning in what he has done. In short, it is man's commentary on man.
 ~funny graduation quote by John Barker, The Superhistorians

   It is not titles that honor men, but men that honor titles.
 ~saying on Jobs by Niccolo Machiavelli

   A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.
 ~funny graduation quote by Harry Truman

   And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
 ~graduation by Abraham Lincoln

   Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow.
 ~sayings about graduation by Dan Rather

   When it is a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.
 ~quotes about Money by Voltaire

   What we need are critical lovers of America - patriots who express their faith in their country by working to improve it
 ~funny graduation quote by Hubert H. Humphrey

   Progress is man's ability to complicate simplicity.
 ~saying on Civilization by Thor Heyerdahl, Fatu-Hiva

   Only nature has a right to grieve perpetually, for she only is innocent. Soon the ice will melt, and the blackbirds sing along the river which he frequented, as pleasantly as ever. The same everlasting serenity will appear in this face of God, and we will not be sorrowful, if he is not
 ~funny graduation quote by Henry David Thoreau

   There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before.
 ~graduation by Robert Lynd, The Blue Lion and Other Essays

   High-tech tomatoes. Mysterious milk. Supersquash. Are we supposed to eat this stuff? Or is it going to eat us?
 ~sayings about graduation by Annita Manning

   In riding a horse, we borrow freedom.
 ~quotes about Horses by Helen Thomson

   You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
 ~funny graduation quote by Art Buchwald

   Whoever is in a hurry shows that the thing he is about is too big for him.
 ~saying on Haste by Lord Chesterfield

   Choose always the way that seems the best, however rough it may be. Custom will soon render it easy and agreeable.
 ~funny graduation quote by Pythagoras

   Two master keys to financial independence: 1. Pay yourself first. Spend only what you have left after saving, not before. 2. Never let your expenses grow as fast as your income.
 ~graduation by

   We can't win at home and we can't win on the road. My problem as general manager is I can't think of another place to play.
 ~sayings about graduation by Pat Williams

   All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers
 ~quotes about Financial by Orison Swett Marden

   Most men would kill the truth if truth would kill their religion.
 ~funny graduation quote by Lemuel K. Washburn, Is The Bible Worth Reading And Other Essays

   We are seldom happy with what we now have, but would go to pieces if we lost any part of it.
 ~saying on Happiness by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.
 ~funny graduation quote by Booker T. Washington

   A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends.
 ~graduation by Kin Hubbard

   Having your book turned into a movie is like seeing your oxen turned into bouillon cubes.
 ~sayings about graduation by John LeCarre

   Situated in some nebulous distance I do what I do so that the universal balance of which I am a part may remain a balance.
 ~quotes about Life by Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

   Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
 ~funny graduation quote by Bob Hope

   When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get them, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either.
 ~saying on Goals by Leo Burnett

   You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.
 ~funny graduation quote by Chris Rock, Bigger and Blacker

   The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool..
 ~graduation by William Shakespeare, As You Like It


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