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funny christian quote generated randomly from our collections

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   Women get the last word in every argumentAnything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
 ~quotes about Women's Greetings by Author Unknown

   With lies you may get ahead in the world - but you can never go back.
 ~funny christian quote by Russian proverb

   Search others for their virtues, yourself for your faults.
 ~saying on Relationship by

   The Russians have a weapon that can wipe out two hundred eighty thousand Americans. That puts them exactly ten years behind Howard Cosell.
 ~funny christian quote by Red Smith

   Every morning say: I will improve something today. Every successful man is improvement – conscious.
 ~christian by

   Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
 ~sayings about christian by Ambrose Bierce

   Tears will get you sympathy; sweat will get you change.
 ~quotes about Attitude by Jesse Jackson

   It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics and chemistry.
 ~funny christian quote by H.L. Mencken, Minority Report, Notebooks, 1956

   I think, what has this day brought me, and what have I given it?
 ~saying on Attitude by Henry Moore

   Physics is mathematical not because we know so much about the physical world, but because we know so little; it is only its mathematical properties that we can discover.
 ~funny christian quote by Bertrand Russell

   Millions and millions of years would still not give me half enough time to describe that tiny instant of all eternity when you put your arms around me and I put my arms around you.
 ~christian by Jacques Prévert

   Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty.
 ~sayings about christian by Henry Ford

   I played as much golf as I could in North Dakota, but summer up there is pretty short. It usually falls on Tuesday.
 ~quotes about Weather by Mike Morley

   Maturity is achieved when a person accepts life as full of tension.
 ~funny christian quote by Joshua L. Liebman

   It appears to be a law that you cannot have a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
 ~saying on Environment by Henry David Thoreau, Walden, 1854

   Generally the theories we believe we call facts, and the facts we disbelieve we call theories.
 ~funny christian quote by Felix Cohen

   We say we love flowers, yet we pluck them. We say we love trees, yet we cut them down. And some people still wonder why some are afraid when they are told they are loved
 ~christian by Unknown

   The truest expression of a people is in its dance and in its music. Bodies never lie.
 ~sayings about christian by Agnes de Mille

   Television has a real problem. They have no page two. Consequently every big story gets the same play and comes across to the viewer as a really big, scary one.
 ~quotes about Media Journalism by Art Buchwald, 1969

   I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
 ~funny christian quote by Jean Kerr, Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall, The Snake Has All the Lines, 1958

   It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself.
 ~saying on Parenting by Joyce Maynard

   No matter how good you are, you're going to lose one-third of your games. No matter how bad you are you're going to win one-third of your games. It's the other third that makes the difference.
 ~funny christian quote by Tommy Lasorda

   The roots of our Soccer Tribe lie deep in our primeval past.
 ~christian by Desmond Morris

   Life didn't promise to be wonderful.
 ~sayings about christian by Teddy Pendergrass

   There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house
 ~quotes about Housewarming by Joe Ryan

   The second half of a man's life is made up of nothing but the habits he has acquired during the first half.
 ~funny christian quote by Feodor Dostoevski

   After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.
 ~saying on Parties by P.J. O'Rourke

   What, after all, is a halo? It's only one more thing to keep clean.
 ~funny christian quote by Christopher Fry

   Man talks about everything, and he talks about everything as though the understanding of everything were all inside him.
 ~christian by Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

   Who, being loved, is poor?
 ~sayings about christian by Oscar Wilde

   It's a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up.
 ~quotes about Time by J.K. Rowling, The Hungarian Horntail, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000

   We must understand that when a society undermines intellectual freedom for its own purposes it is absolutely morally bad, but when it represses biological freedom for its own purposes it is absolutely morally good
 ~funny christian quote by Robert M. Pirsig

   Never does nature say one thing and wisdom another
 ~saying on Earth Day by Juvenal, Satires

   There is always a lot to be thankful for, if you take the time to look. For example, I'm sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
 ~funny christian quote by Author Unknown

   A dog is not almost human and I know of no greater insult to the canine race than to describe it as such.
 ~christian by John Holmes

   Criticizing is usually a greater fault than the thing criticized. It easier to be critical than correct.
 ~sayings about christian by

   Not unfortunately the universe is wild - game-flavoured as a hawk's wing.
 ~quotes about Life by B.P. Blood

   To love means not to impose your own powers on your fellow man but offer him your help. And if he refuses it, to b and the whole process will repeat itself until you come across a kingdom like Egypt...that thrives, and continues to flourish. This kingdom will become your best friend, your soulmate, and your love
 ~funny christian quote by Helen Keller

   a heart keeps your body alive but love makes you live
 ~saying on Love by Laura

   He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began
 ~funny christian quote by Leo Tolstoy

   It is the eye of ignorance that assigns a fixed and unchangeable color to every object; beware of this stumbling block.
 ~christian by Paul Gauguin

   Unity can only be manifested by the Binary. Unity itself and the idea of Unity are already two.
 ~sayings about christian by Buddha

   No man can cause more grief than that one clinging blindly to the vices of his ancestors.
 ~quotes about Conformity by William Faulkner

   In general, mankind, since the improvement of cookery, eats twice as much as nature requires.
 ~funny christian quote by Benjamin Franklin

   All the knowledge I possess everyone else can acquire, but my heart is all my own.
 ~saying on Being Yourself by Johann von Goethe, The Sorrows of Young Werther, 1774

   Somebody recently figured out that we have 35 million laws to enforce the ten commandments.
 ~funny christian quote by Attributed to both Bert Masterson and Earl Wilson

   Friends are an aid to the young, to guard them from error; to the elderly, to attend to their wants and to supplement their failing power of action; to those in the prime of life, to assist them to noble deeds.
 ~christian by Aristotle

   He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.
 ~sayings about christian by Friedrich Nietzsche

   My love-lies-bleeding.
 ~quotes about Heartache by Thomas Campbell

   My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for fourUnless there are three other people
 ~funny christian quote by Orson Welles

   Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass.
 ~saying on Golf by Bob Hope

   There are no rules of architecture for a castle in the clouds.
 ~funny christian quote by G.K. Chesterton

   The law condemns and punishes only actions within certain definite and narrow limits; it thereby justifies, in a way, all similar actions that lie outside those limits.
 ~christian by Leo Tolstoy, What I Believe

   God pours life into death and death into life without a drop being spilled.
 ~sayings about christian by Author Unknown

   Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed.
 ~quotes about Nature by Francis Bacon, Novum Organum, 1620

   If you're going through hell, keep going.
 ~funny christian quote by Winston Churchill

   Women's chains have been forged by men, not by anatomy.
 ~saying on Feminism by Estelle R. Ramey

   Life is like riding a bicycle, you don't fall off unless you stop pedalling.
 ~funny christian quote by

   You know you're an Arizona native when you run to the window just to watch a dust storm.
 ~christian by Marshall Trimble, quoted in You Know You're an Arizona Native, When... compiled by Don Dedera, 1993


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