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funny ass quote generated randomly from our collections

funny college quote,i'm i'm in love lyric not sayings,quotes on life love and friends,feel good quote,popular friendship quotes,

   Open your heart - open it wide; someone is standing outside.
 ~quotes about Kindness by Quoted in Believe: A Christmas Treasury by Mary Engelbreit

   What is one to say about June, the time of perfect young summer, the fulfillment of the promise of the earlier months, and with as yet no sign to remind one that its fresh young beauty will ever fade.
 ~funny ass quote by Gertrude Jekyll

   Envy slays itself by its own arrows.
 ~saying on Jealousy by Author Unknown

   It frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
 ~funny ass quote by Groucho Marx

   Mediocrity is a hand-rail.
 ~ass by Charles Louis de Secondat, Baron de Montesquieu, Mes pensées

   But if thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought.
 ~sayings about ass by George Orwell

   Prosperity is not without many fears and distastes, and adversity is not without comforts and hopes.
 ~quotes about Adversity by Francis Bacon

   There is no education like adversity
 ~funny ass quote by Disraeli

   Many of us are equal to life's emergencies who cannot bear its day-after-dayness.
 ~saying on Life by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   (Referring to a glass of water) I mixed this myself. Two parts H, one part O. I don't trust anybody
 ~funny ass quote by Steven Wright

   In a real dark night of the soul, it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day
 ~ass by F. Scott Fitzgerald

   Nothing hits harder nor sticks longer than a wise timely tip.
 ~sayings about ass by

   Between a man and his wife nothing ought to rule but love.
 ~quotes about Marriage by William Penn

   When we Indians kill meat, we eat it all up.... When we build houses, we make little holes. When we burn grass for grasshoppers, we don't ruin things. We shake down acorns and pinenuts. We don't chop down the trees.
 ~funny ass quote by Wintu Indian, quoted in Julian Burger, The Gaia Atlas of First Peoples, 1990

   Union gives strength.
 ~saying on Relationship by Aesop

   Men for the sake of getting a living forget to live.
 ~funny ass quote by Margaret Fuller

   Words of kindness are more powerful than cruel swords.
 ~ass by Jose B. Cabajar

   When one is in love, one always begins by deceiving oneself, and one always ends by deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.
 ~sayings about ass by Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

   Jealousy, that dragon which slays love under the pretence of keeping it alive
 ~quotes about Love Quotes by Havelock Ellis

   Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they're looking for ideas.
 ~funny ass quote by Paula Poundstone

   I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.
 ~saying on Famous Saying by Cicero

   I'm in shape. Round is a shape... isn't it?
 ~funny ass quote by Author Unknown

   Those who do not think about the future cannot have one.
 ~ass by Brian Tracy

   All you need is love
 ~sayings about ass by John Lennon

   Women are like dogs really. They love like dogs, a little insistently. And they like to fetch and carry and come back wistfully after hard words, and learn rather easily to carry a basket.
 ~quotes about Women by Mary Roberts Rinehart

   We shall require a substantially new manner of thinking if mankind is to survive.
 ~funny ass quote by Albert Einstein

   If we resist our passions, it is more because of their weakness than because of our strength.
 ~saying on Self-Control by François, duc de La Rochefoucauld

   There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time.
 ~funny ass quote by Napoleon I, Maxims, 1815

   We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.
 ~ass by Alfred E. Newman

   Virtues are dangerous as vices insofar as they are allowed to rule over one as authorities and not as qualities one develops oneself.
 ~sayings about ass by Friedrich Nietzsche

   What we are is God's gift to usWhat we become is our gift to God
 ~quotes about Graduation by Eleanor Powell

   Road sense is the offspring of courtesy and the parent of safety.
 ~funny ass quote by Australian Traffic Rule, quoted in Quotations for Special Occasions by Maud van Buren

   Whoever one is, and wherever one is, one is always in the wrong if one is rude.
 ~saying on Manners by Maurice Baring

   We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home.
 ~funny ass quote by Edward R. Murrow

   He who opens a school door, closes a prison
 ~ass by Victor Hugo

   Purring would seem to be, in her case, an automatic safety valve device for dealing with happiness overflow.
 ~sayings about ass by Monica Edwards

   What would constitute useful history? That which should teach us our duties and our rights, without appearing to teach them.
 ~quotes about History by Voltaire, Philosophical Dictionary

   Forget every evil or insult; remember every kindness.
 ~funny ass quote by

   I don't paint things. I only paint the difference between things.
 ~saying on Art by Henri Matisse

   The simple lack of her is more to me than others' presence.
 ~funny ass quote by Edward Thomas

   A pun does not commonly justify a blow in return. But if a blow were given for such cause, and death ensued, the jury would be judges both of the facts and of the pun, and might, if the latter were of an aggravated character, return a verdict of justifiable homicide.
 ~ass by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858

   The public blabbers about preventative medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure.
 ~sayings about ass by Martin H. Fischer

   What you can't get out of, get into wholeheartedly.
 ~quotes about Wise Words by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   If all the rich people in the world divided up their money amongst themselves there wouldn't be enough to go around
 ~funny ass quote by Christina Stead

   Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
 ~saying on Simplicity by Albert Einstein

   My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.
 ~funny ass quote by Phyllis Diller

   Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.
 ~ass by Albert Schweitzer

   There are so many little dyings that it doesn't matter which of them is death.
 ~sayings about ass by Kenneth Patchen

   I love you not as something private and personal, which is my own, but as something universal and worthy of love which I have found
 ~quotes about Romantic Quotes by Henry David Thoreau

   Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.
 ~funny ass quote by Henry Emerson Fosdick

   The two offices of memory are collection and distribution.
 ~saying on Memory by Samuel Johnson

   You look forward to it like a birthday party when you're a kid. You think something wonderful is going to happen
 ~funny ass quote by Joe DiMaggio

   Sometimes it hurt more then we can bear.If we could live without passion maybe we'd know some kind of peace..but we would be hollow..Empty rooms shuttered and dank.Without passion we'd be truly dead
 ~ass by David Boreanaz

   I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way.
 ~sayings about ass by Franklin P. Adams

   In any other sport, if you miss the catch all you lose is the ball.
 ~quotes about Cheerleading by Author Unknown

   We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.
 ~funny ass quote by Luciano de Crescenzo

   Hem your blessings with thankfulness so they don't unravel
 ~saying on Thank You. by Author Unknown

   A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts
 ~funny ass quote by Steve Fergosi

   There are those, I know, who will say that the liberation of humanity, the freedom of man and mind, is nothing but a dreamThey are rightIt is the American dream
 ~ass by Archibald MacLeish


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