funny 50th birthday sayings and quotations on 50th birthday sayings

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funny 50th birthday sayings generated randomly from our collections

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   Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of goldBut other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow
 ~quotes about Retirement by Douglas Pagels, These Are the Gifts I'd Like to Give to You

   All love that has not friendship for its base,
is like a mansion built upon the sand.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Ella Wheeler Wilcox

   When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
 ~saying on Baseball by Woody Allen

   Biography should be written by an acute enemy.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Arthur James Balfour

   If at first you don't succeed, you're running about average.
 ~50th birthday by M.H. Alderson

   Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by John F Kennedy

   We are never completely contemporaneous with our present. History advances in disguise; it appears on stage wearing a mask of the preceding scene, and we tend to lose the meaning of the play.
 ~quotes about History by Régis Debray, Revolution in the Revolution?

   Today they build studios with almost complete isolation on each musician. They sit in little cages and listen on headphones. In my opinion, that's not so good for the creative process. We used to gather around the piano, run over the tunes a few times, and the musicians would get ideas for fills or for rhythm licks, and that was more fun. I know that still goes on, but it's not the same
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Chet Atkins (June 20, 1924 - June 30, 2001)

   Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it
 ~saying on Death by W. Somerset Maugham

   Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keeps friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Grenville Kleiser

   The bomb that fell on Hiroshima fell on America too. It fell on no city, no munition plants, no docks. It erased no church, vaporized no public buildings, reduced no man to his atomic elements. But it fell, it fell.
 ~50th birthday by Hermann Hagedorn, The Bomb That Fell on America

   If I were asked to enumerate ten educational stupidities, the giving of grades would head the list... If I can't give a child a better reason for studying than a grade on a report card, I ought to lock my desk and go home and stay there
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Dorothy De Zouche

   If you talk to your children, you can help them to keep their lives together. If you talk to them skillfully, you can help them to build future dreams
 ~quotes about Children by Jim Rohn

   It is the will of God and Nature that these mortal bodies be laid aside, when the soul is to enter into real life; 'tis rather an embrio state, a preparation for living; a man is not completely born until he be dead: Why then should we grieve that a new
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Benjamin Franklin, 22 February 1756

   We all walk in the dark and each of us must learn to turn on his or her own light.
 ~saying on Light by Earl Nightingale

   You can get all A's and still flunk life.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Walker Percy

   The book of the moment often has immense vogue, while the book of the age, which comes in its company from the press, lies unnoticed; but the great book has its revenge. It lives to see its contemporary pushed up shelf by shelf until it finds its final resting-place in the garret or the auction room.
 ~50th birthday by Hamilton Wright Mabie

   There are cases where psychoanalysis works worse than anything else. But who said that psychoanalysis was to be applied always and everywhere.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by C.G. Jung

   It is curious that with the advent of the automobile and the airplane, the bicycle is still with us. Perhaps people like the world they can see from a bike, or the air they breathe when they're out on a bike. Or they like the bicycle's simplicity and the precision with which it is made. Or because they like the feeling of being able to hurtle through air one minute, and saunter through a park the next, without leaving behind clouds of choking exhaust, without leaving behind so much as a footstep.
 ~quotes about Bicycling by Gurdon S. Leete

   Everyone is born a king, and most people die in exile.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance, 1893

   Books were my pass to personal freedom. I learned to read at age three, and soon discovered there was a whole world to conquer that went beyond our farm in Mississippi
 ~saying on Books by Oprah Winfrey

   Many a boomerang does notreturn but chooses freedom instead
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Anonymous

   When nobody around you seems to measure up, it's time to check your yardstick.
 ~50th birthday by Bill Lemley

   It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Author Unknown

   A man of business may talk of philosophy; a man who has none may practise it.
 ~quotes about Business by Alexander Pope, Thoughts on Various Subjects, 1727

   Little boldness is needed to assail the opinions and practices of notoriously wicked men; but to rebuke great and good men for their conduct, and to impeach their discernment, is the highest effort of moral courage.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by William Lloyd Garrison

   Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you.
 ~saying on Dreams by Marsha Norman

   Squash is boxing with racquets.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Jonah Barrington

   Speak only the truth. Act with only the best intentions. Once you get into the habit, you can live by this code.
 ~50th birthday by Unknown

   Stubborness does have its helpful features. You always know what you are going to be thinking tomorrow.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Glen Beaman

   In all men is evil sleeping; the good man is he who will not awaken it, in himself or in other men.
 ~quotes about Integrity by Mary Renault

   Let freedom ring, let the white dove sing, let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong... it's Independence Day
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Martina McBride

   An election is comingUniversal peace is declared and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry
 ~saying on Election Day by T.S. Eliot

   Why get married? For human beings, marriage is such an unnatural state. If you want monogamy, it has been said, you should marry a swan.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Quentin Crisp, The Art of Celibacy

   All happiness depends on a leisurely breakfast.
 ~50th birthday by John Gunther

   The large print giveth, but the small print taketh away.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Tom Waits, Small Change

   In general, my children refused to eat anything that hadn't danced on TV.
 ~quotes about Advertising by Erma Bombeck

   Tomorrow is the day when idlers work, and fools reform.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Edward Young

   My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.
 ~saying on Life by Cary Grant

   If all the economists were laid end to end, they'd never reach a conclusion.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by George Bernard Shaw

   Red meat is not bad for you. Now blue-green meat, that’s bad for you!
 ~50th birthday by Tommy Smothers

   If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by John A. Simone, Sr.

   The brave die never, though they sleep in dust:,Their courage nerves a thousand living men.
 ~quotes about Patriot Day by Minot J. Savage

   Love unlocks doors and opens windows that weren't even there before.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   Foolishness always results when the tongue outraces the brain.
 ~saying on Speaking by Author Unknown

   What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life - to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by George Eliot

   There are big ships and small shipsBut the best ship of all is friendship
 ~50th birthday by Author Unknown

   History studies not just facts and institutions, its real subject is the human spirit.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Fustel de Coulange, La Cité antique, 1864

   Women who feel naked without their lipstick are well over thirty.
 ~quotes about Women by Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966

   As I know more of mankind I expect less of them, and am ready now to call a man a good man upon easier terms than I was formerly.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Samuel Johnson

   The greatest love is a mother's; then a dog's; then a sweetheart's.
 ~saying on Dogs by Polish Proverb

   It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Mark Twain

   Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
 ~50th birthday by Mark Twain

   People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.
 ~sayings about 50th birthday by Abraham Lincoln

   May you have warm words on a cool evening, a full moon on a dark night, and a smooth road all the way to your door
 ~quotes about Goodbye by Irish Toast

   A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Bob Hope

   All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother.
 ~saying on Mothers by Abraham Lincoln

   Jesse Helms and Newt Gingrich were shaking hands congratulating themselves on the introduction of an antigay bill in Congress. If it passes, they won't be able to shake hands, because it will then be illegal for a prick to touch an asshole.
 ~funny 50th birthday sayings by Judy Carter

   Christmas, children, is not a dateIt is a state of mind
 ~50th birthday by Mary Ellen Chase


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