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It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away than by oppression and discrimination half a block from home The easier it is to do, the harder it is to change. The chicken came first - God would look silly sitting on an egg. The end of childhood is when things cease to astonish us. When the world seems familiar, when one has got used to existence, one has become an adult. No one has ever loved anyone the way everyone wants to be loved. Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, How can he want me the way I look in the morning? It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve. The fishing was good; it was the catching that was bad. I have never seen a bad television program, because I refuse to. God gave me a mind, and a wrist that turns things off. Baseball players quit playing and they take up golf. Basketball players quit, take up golf. Football players quit, take up golf. What are we supposed to take up when we quit? One's real life is often the life that one does not lead. Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together. All of us have had the experience of a sudden joy that came when nothing in the world had forewarned us of its coming - a joy so thrilling that if it was born of misery we remembered even the misery with tenderness. I love the valiant; but it is not enough to wield a broadsword, one must also know against whom. I will not permit thirty men to travel four hundred miles to agitate a bag of wind. I go to nature to be soothed and healed, and to have my senses put in order. It's hard to be responsible, adult and sensible all the time. How good it is to have a sister whose heart is as young as your own. Death is patiently making my mask as I sleep. Each morning I awake to discover in the corners of my eyes the small tears of his wax. We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love I prefer winter and fall, when you feel the bone structure of the landscape - the loneliness of it, the dead feeling of winter. Something waits beneath it, the whole story doesn't show. Sometimes we make love with our eyesSometimes we make love with our handsSometimes we make love with our bodiesAlways we make love with our hearts Dreaming is an act of pure imagination, attesting in all men a creative power, which if it were available in waking, would make every man a Dante or Shakespeare. Ultimately, aren't we all just talking monkeys with an attitude problem? The future is always beginning now. Out of a hundred years a few minutes were made that stayed with me, not a hundred years. Prayer is exhaling the spirit of man and inhaling the spirit of God. These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it. People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn't drive, there's something wrong with him. Pharmaceutical companies will soon rule the world if we keep letting them believe we are a happy, functional society so long as all the women are on Prozac, all children on Ritalin, and all men on Viagra. The great composer does not set to work because he is inspired, but becomes inspired because he is working. Beethoven, Wagner, Bach and Mozart settled down day after day to the job in hand with as much regularity as an accountant settles down each day to his figures. They didn't waste time waiting for inspiration. Most of us retain enough of the theological attitude to think that we are little gods. They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind Things are in the saddle, and ride mankind I am having an out of money experience. A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works. But the great tragedy of Science - the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact - which is so constantly being enacted under the eyes of philosophers... Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak; sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom. The public is hedged about by so many goddam bookkeepers that no time is left in which to produce. More time is spent in carrying out garbage than in carrying in food. Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too There's a long, long trail a-winding into the land of my dreams. It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. Traditions are group efforts to keep the unexpected from happening. Home is where you can say anything you like cause nobody listens to you anyway. It is well to remember that a Martian observing his first baseball game would be quite correct in concluding that the last two words of the National Anthem are: PLAY BALL! I've noticed that everybody that is for abortion has already been born. The stars are the street lights of eternity. As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master This expresses my idea of democracy Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know. Up to five goals is journalism. After that, it becomes statistics. I pledge allegiance to the earth and to the flora, fauna and human life that it supports, one planet indivisible, with safe air, water & soil, economic justice, equal rights and peace for all. A kiss without a hug is like a flower without the fragrance. A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops. That's baseball, and it's my game. Y' know, you take your worries to the game, and you leave 'em there. You yell like crazy for your guys. It's good for your lungs, gives you a lift, and nobody calls the cops. Pretty girls, lots of 'em. Now I know why they tell you to put your head between your knees on crash landings. You think you're going to kiss your ass good-bye. It is sweet to serve one's country by deeds, and it is not absurd to serve her by words All the things one has forgotten scream for help in dreams. 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