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famous funny movie quotes generated randomly from our collections

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   Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.
 ~quotes about Smoking by Florence King

   Americans are broad-minded people. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater, and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn't drive, there is something wrong with him.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Art Buchwald, How Un-American Can You Get?, Have I Ever Lied to You?, 1966

   When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
 ~saying on Sanity by Mark Twain

   If there is a God, he's a great mathematician.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Paul Dirac

   It's good sportsmanship not to pick up lost balls while they are still rolling.
 ~movie by Mark Twain

   Forty is the old age of youth; fifty the youth of old age.
 ~sayings about movie by Victor Hugo

   Science is all those things which are confirmed to such a degree that it would be unreasonable to withhold one's provisional consent.
 ~quotes about Science by Stephen Jay Gould

   Never judge a day by its weather. Sunshine is uplifting; rain, nourishing; wind, exhilarating, snow, cleansing; hail, stimulating. Any weather is better than none.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by

   It is what you read when you don't have to that determines what you will be when you can't help it.
 ~saying on Books Reading by Oscar Wilde

   Gardening requires lots of water - most of it in the form of perspiration.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Lou Erickson

   When freedom from want and freedom from fear are achieved, man's remains will be in rigor mortis.
 ~movie by Martin H. Fischer

   We are closer to the ants than to butterflies. Very few people can endure much leisure.
 ~sayings about movie by Gerald Brenan

   It's not catastrophes, murders, deaths, diseases, that age and kill us; it's the way people look and laugh, and run up the steps of omnibuses
 ~quotes about Death by Virginia Woolf

   The walls of books around him, dense with the past, formed a kind of insulation against the present world and its disasters.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Ross MacDonald

   Warning: Humor may be hazardous to your illness
 ~saying on Get Well Soon by Ellie Katz

   Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Unknown

   The power of quotation is as dreadful a weapon as any which the human intellect can forge.
 ~movie by John Jay Chapman

   If man were immortal he could be perfectly sure of seeing the day when everything in which he had trusted should betray his trust, and, in short, of coming eventually to hopeless misery. He would break down, at last, as every good fortune, as every dynasty, as every civilization does. In place of this we have death.
 ~sayings about movie by Charles Sanders Peirce

   A goodbye isn't painful unless you're never going to say hello again
 ~quotes about Goodbye by Author Unknown

   Gossip needn't be false to be evil - there's a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Frank A. Clark

   Home, the spot of earth supremely blest,A dearer, sweeter spot than all the rest.
 ~saying on Housewarming by Robert Montgomery

   Don't waste time learning the tricks of the trade. Instead, learn the trade.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Attributed to both James Charlton and H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

   What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on?
 ~movie by Henry David Thoreau

   A friend can tell you things you don't want to tell yourself.
 ~sayings about movie by Frances Ward Weller

   It's easy to make a buck. It's a lot tougher to make a difference
 ~quotes about Celebrity by Tom Brokaw

   God and other artists are always a little obscure.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Oscar Wilde

   The family is one of nature's masterpieces.
 ~saying on Family by George Santayana, The Life of Reason

   Optimism is the foundation of courage.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Nicholas Murray Butler

   Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!
 ~movie by Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836

   The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents.
 ~sayings about movie by John J. Plomp

   Those who never rebelled against God or at some point in their lives shaken their fists in the face of heaven, have never encountered God at all.
 ~quotes about God by Catherine Marshall, Christy, 1967

   No two gardens are the same. No two days are the same in one garden.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Hugh Johnson

   It is impossible to calculate the moral mischief, if I may so express it, that mental lying has produced in society. When a man has so far corrupted and prostituted the chastity of his mind as to subscribe his professional belief to things he does not believe he has prepared himself for the commission of every other crime.
 ~saying on Honesty by Thomas Paine, The Age of Reason

   Soon I will be an old, white-haired lady, into whose lap someone places a baby, saying, Smile, Grandma! - I, who myself so recently was photographed on my grandmother's lap.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Liv Ullmann

   Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but backwards and in high heels
 ~movie by Faith Whittlesey

   The most prized all possessions is a pleasant disposition – 10% nature; 90% nurture.
 ~sayings about movie by

   To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness
 ~quotes about Adversity by Bertrand Russell

   Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Jim Bishop

   On every stem, on every leaf,... and at the root of everything that grew, was a professional specialist in the shape of grub, caterpillar, aphis, or other expert, whose business it was to devour that particular part.
 ~saying on Gardens by Oliver Wendell Holmes

   when I Die Let It Be When They Come For me Bury Me a G.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Tupac

   Logic hasn't wholly dispelled the society of witches and prophets and sorcerers and soothsayers.
 ~movie by Raymond F. Jones, The Non-Statistical Man

   Listening to both sides of a story will convince you that there is more to a story than both sides.
 ~sayings about movie by Frank Tyger

   Great food is like great sex. The more you have the more you want.
 ~quotes about Food by Gael Greene

   Put your heart, mind, intellect and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret of success.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Swami Sivananda

   Our credulity is greatest concerning the things we know least about. And since we know least about ourselves, we are ready to believe all that is said about us. Hence the mysterious power of both flattery and calumny.
 ~saying on Self by Eric Hoffer, The Passionate State of Mind

   Says the rude child: No, I won't do it. Says the courteous grown-up: Yes, I won't do it.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   How glorious a greeting the sun gives the mountains!
 ~movie by John Muir

   We must fight against the spirit of unconscious cruelty with which we treat the animals. Animals suffer as much as we do. True humanity does not allow us to impose such sufferings on them. It is our duty to make the whole world recognize it. Until we extend our circle of compassion to all living things, humanity will not find peace.
 ~sayings about movie by Albert Schweitzer, The Philosophy of Civilization

   Trip over love, you can get upFall in love and you fall forever
 ~quotes about Commitment Ceremonies by Author Unknown

   Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout of some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not drive on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Winston Churchill

   Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
 ~saying on Women by Bill Maher

   The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Mark Twain

   I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
 ~movie by Mark Twain

   In these times you have to be an optimist to open your eyes when you awake in the morning.
 ~sayings about movie by Carl Sandburg, New York Post, 9 September 1960

   I don't believe one grows older. I think that what happens early on in life is that at a certain age one stands still and stagnates.
 ~quotes about Age by T.S. Eliot

   I feel that there is an angel inside me whom I am constantly shocking.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Jean Cocteau

   Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
 ~saying on Luck by Mark Twain

   He loves his country best who strives to make it best.
 ~famous funny movie quotes by Robert G. Ingersoll

   Gardens... should be like lovely, well-shaped girls: all curves, secret corners, unexpected deviations, seductive surprises and then still more curves.
 ~movie by H.E. Bates, A Love of Flowers


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