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This is not done by jostling in the street. The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed. Our modern industrial economy takes a mountain covered with trees, lakes, running streams and transforms it into a mountain of junk, garbage, slime pits, and debris. There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. Most people who possess anything like an acre, or half of it, contribute weekly to the support of a gentleman known as Jobbing Gardener. You are warned of the danger that he may prove to be Garden Pest no 1. The footprint of the owner is the best manure. The best and most efficient pharmacy is within your own system. The only thing that overcomes hard luck is hard work We are happy when for everything inside us there is a corresponding something outside us. Ladies, here's a hint. If you're up against a girl with big boobs, bring her to the net and make her hit backhand volleys. That's the hardest shot for the well-endowed. Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that. The best time for planning a book is while you're doing the dishes. It is not the employer who pays the wages. He only handles the money. It is the product that pays the wages. You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. Men err when they think they can be inhuman exploiters in their business life, and loving husbands and fathers at home. If it sells, it's art. The worst of a modern stylish mansion is that it has no place for ghosts. You put a baby in a crib with an apple and a rabbit. If it eats the rabbit and plays with the apple, I'll buy you a new car. There is still no cure for the common birthday The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes. The typical gambler might not really understand the probabilistic nuances of the wheel or the dice, but such things seem a bit more tractable than, say, trying to raise a child in this lunatic society of ours. I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. Salvador Dali seduced many ladies, particularly American ladies, but these seductions usually consisted of stripping them naked in his apartment, frying a couple of eggs, putting them on the woman's shoulders and, without a word, showing them the door. Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses. If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. Give me odorous at sunrise a garden of beautiful flowers where I can walk undisturbed. I am a nutritional overachiever. When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That's my religion. Do what we can, summer will have its flies. Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it. A nickname is the hardest stone that the devil can throw at a man. Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness. You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, she is beautiful because you love her. In the lifetime of one person, we went from figuring out where we came from to figuring out how to get rid of ourselves. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. A highbrow is a man who has found something more interesting than women. I held a moment in my hand, brilliant as a star, fragile as a flower, a tiny sliver of one hour. I dripped it carelessly, Ah! I didn't know, I held opportunity. I am an invisible man.... 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Swinging at daisies is like playing electric guitar with a tennis racket: if it were that easy, we could all be Jerry Garcia. The ball changes everything. Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion If winning isn't everything, why do they keep score? Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer. Almost any compromise is better than a lawsuit. All lasting agreements are made by compromise. Nothing made by brute force lasts. Confidence, like art, never comes from having all the answers; it comes from being open to all the questions Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul. Things which you do not hope happen more frequently than things which you do hope. I am my own heaven and hell! Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent. The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars. 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